Holiday Jokes · Christmas
24 Christmas Jokes for Kids (Clean and Funny)
Clean Christmas jokes for kids about Santa, snowmen, elves, and reindeer - perfect for crackers, cards, and advent calendars.
What makes these jokes work
Christmas jokes have a very specific job description. They need to be short enough to read off a cracker, clean enough for a table with grandparents at it, and silly enough that a six-year-old repeats them right through dinner and into Boxing Day.
The best ones are also written down rather than told, which is unusual for children's jokes. A Christmas joke lives on a slip of paper, in an advent calendar, or inside a card, so it has to work without a performance.
These cover Santa, snowmen, reindeer, and elves, and every one of them keeps the magic intact rather than spoiling it.
How to tell them
- Slip one into each day of an advent calendar. It is the cheapest possible upgrade.
- Handwrite one inside a card - it beats a printed cracker joke because it was chosen.
- At Christmas dinner, give each person one joke rather than reading them all yourself.
- None of these spoil the Santa question, so they are safe for any age at the table.
Easy christmas jokes for ages 4-6
Short setups and instant punchlines, so a preschooler or kindergartener can remember the whole christmas joke after hearing it once.
What do elves learn in school?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: The elf-abet!
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Frosted Flakes!
Why is Santa so good at karate?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Because he has a black belt!
What do you call an obnoxious reindeer?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Rude-olph!
What's a snowman's favorite snack?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Ice Krispie treats!
Knock knock! Who's there? Knock knock! Who's there? Mary. Mary who?.
Reveal the punchline!
Joke teller: Knock knock!
Listener: Who's there?
Joke teller: Mary.
Listener: Mary who?
Joke teller: Mary Christmas!
Why is Rudolph's nose so red?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Because he has a cold from flying in the snow!
What does a gingerbread man use to make his bed?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Cookie sheets!
How does a snowman get to work?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: By icicle!
What do you call an elf who can sing?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: A wrapper!
What do reindeer say before they tell a joke?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: This one will sleigh you!
What's a snowman's favorite lunch?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: An ice-burger!
What do snowmen eat for dinner?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Chilli!
What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Sandy Claws!
Knock knock! Who's there? Knock knock! Who's there? Snow. Snow who?.
Reveal the punchline!
Joke teller: Knock knock!
Listener: Who's there?
Joke teller: Snow.
Listener: Snow who?
Joke teller: Snow use, I forgot my name again!
Why does Santa have such a long beard?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Because he's bad at shaving!
What do snowmen call their mom and dad?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Mom and Popsicle!
Christmas jokes for ages 7-9
A little more wordplay. These suit confident readers who have started noticing that words can mean two things at once.
Why can't Christmas trees sew?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: They always drop their needles!
Why does Santa go down chimneys?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Because it soots him!
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Frostbite!
What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa when she looked at the sky?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Looks like rain, dear!
Why is the Christmas elf always happy?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: Because he's always elfie-steem!
Cleverer christmas jokes for ages 10-12
Puns and misdirection that reward a bit of thinking - good for tweens who claim they are too old for jokes.
Why did the ornament go to the hospital?
Reveal the punchline!
Answer: It had too many hang-ups!
Common questions
What is a good Christmas cracker joke for kids?
"How does a snowman get to work? By icicle!" is the ideal cracker joke: one line, one pun, and it fits on a slip of paper.
Do any of these jokes spoil the magic of Santa?
No. Every Christmas joke here treats Santa, the elves, and the reindeer as real, so they are safe to read out at a table with children of any age.
Can I print these for an advent calendar?
Yes. The print page will turn a selection into small cards, which is exactly the right size for a calendar pocket or a cracker.
More kid-friendly laughs
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